Archives > April 2008
It's 10.58pm... and I am READY to leave. The cab is picking me up at 3.15 so I figure I am not even going to sleep!
I packed my suitcase, used the same one for last year's 4-day business convention in Sardinia, so I am quite proud that I was able to fit everything in it... well, not everything, I only brought a pair of flat sandals, thong slippers, wedge sandals and the sneakers I'll travel with. But the friggin' snorkeling equipment took up a lot of room! the fins laid down along the sides of the suitcase still looked too bulky, plus I had to pack my bellydance fundamentals... I mean I need my gear! Skirts and shorts, tanks and tees, thank goodness summer clothes take up less room. Then all the lotions and make-up, ever since this liquid security precaution took place it's been harder and harder to pack suitcases, because back in the day I used to board all that stuff on the plane in the carry-on.
So packed suitcase, took intensive shower with apricot scrub to prepare the skin for a seriously amazing tan, then I washed my hair and straightened up the house THE MINIMUM. Loaded up new songs into my ipod, charged the camera batteries, closed up some blinds in the house, now all I have to do is get dressed and take the suitcase downstairs! Therefore I'm sitting here just trying to kill time, and so looking forward to being on the beach already, with my feet stuck in the sand, sipping on pina coladas and staring into the sea's horizon!
Credit for the .gif
So today was the last day at work before a whole week of fun in the sun! Actually tomorrow is a National Holiday here so that's why I won't be going to work, but that's great... because tomorrow I have to:
- meet the catsitter to give him my house keys and show him a few things about my Tigro's needs
- meet the vacation group to discuss important issues such as travel and other practicalities
- teach 1 hour
- find summer clothes stashed somewhere in my house closets
- do laundry - THANK GAWD FOR DRYERS!
- do my hair
- clean the house just enough
- pack my suitcase
and I figure tomorrow evening I won't even go to bed because we need to be at the airport at 4.40am!!!! Which means I would have to leave the house at 3.30am so what the heck is the point of going to sleep?? Today I did a lot of things, I bought the stamp for my passport, made a list of necessary items, bought sunscreen (the heavy protection for the Egyptian sun!), fins, a mask and tube for snorkeling (and heavens know if I will succeed) and even water shoes to step on rocks and avoid sea urchins.
Tis the thing I hate most about traveling, getting ready, packing and heading off to the airport... besides this I am SO EXCITED! I am counting to spend 7 full days in the sun swimming and having fun relaxing and dancing my ass off, mastering double veil techniques and much more! So so so happy!!!
And forget about the trip, I am in a very very positive mood lately. Just thinking about the activity I am in the process of starting up keeps me alive... my studying, my family, my friends, I am going to buy a new bedroom soon and it's been so exciting shopping around for the best items! Ok, there are rough times, there are things in my life I am not satisfied with... yet again I am just so, so fortunate to be ALIVE, to LIVE my life and enjoy the good moments, cherishing the memories and looking forward to new ones. Many of you know I hate snapping pictures, so I hope there'll be a merciful soul there who will take some and include me!! Can't wait to leave!!
This morning I woke up feeling awful, and I mean every part of my body was aching. Head, neck, back, calves, throat, everything, I immediately took a painkiller and now that I am writing to you I am feeling much better. I had a dream about my ex fiancee, that he introduced me to his new wife (I don't even know if he's married) and I got all nasty and aggravated over it. I dreamt I went up to her and told her to get out of my house, but then again I'd tell her it wasn't her, it was him... I have no idea why I had this dream, also because to today I strongly believe I have made the best decision by breaking up with him... I'm just going to blame this nightmare on the back ache that was haunting me through the night.
I have to continue a translation I am doing for my activity, plus I have to go vote. Then I am going to take my nice shower and do my hair, maybe tonight I'll go out... I don't know yet. The weather is yucky, it's not raining now but it's not even sunny, plus it's cool and breezy.
I have been working on my new activity, thinking about the concept, the domain name... it's extremely hard finding a domain that makes sense and hasn't been already bought... then I'm still doing my bellydance and getting ready for my departure to Egypt on the 26th, plus I am studying for my Sessions certificate, right now I'm taking an xhtml/css course so I expect my site will start looking a lot more polished soon :)
I just wish the day was made up of more than 24 hours... and that we had 3 days of weekend where we could take the time to do all the things we want and need to do.
April. The worst month of the year, along with April... and this month I had:
- gym payment 150 euros
- furniture payment 256 euros
- car insurance 327 euros (1 installment out of two)
- condo fees 448 euros
- second Egypt vacation payment 450 Euros... I am missing 160 Euros and I'm done
- a fuckin' ticket in Cernusco S/N 85 Gotdarn Euros... I am PISSED!
But nonetheless I'm keeping a smile on my face! I am buying a new domain along with bubblesnow.net, plus I am in the process of starting up my own activity, and hope this will be soon reality! Sorry but I went tanning today and my face is starting to hurt, so I think I will go to bed... but I'll check in soon enough.
Sometimes I just wish I could see what's beyond, what's in store for me. Then maybe I'll be no longer disappointed, if I had already known how it would have ended... or even, I would have never started something which I knew would have crumbled into the same nothingness it had sprung from.
Seeing it all would also help me to stop obsessing over what in the end is matterless but now seems so paramount to me... in the end even if one reaches the bottom of her own mountain with all imaginable tools she will realize that some are completely useless, yet they were so heavy to carry all the way over to the destination. But what is the destination? What if I go up a mountain that isn't my target in the end, and I realize that once I'm on the top? Should I muster up the courage to climb back down and waste away days, months, years or a lifetime trying to find that right thing or should I sit on the peak of settling down and envy the horizon for that glimmer of a dream? How tangible can a dream be, even if we try hard as hell to make it a reality? Is the dream what we really dream it to be?
Lifetimes of unanswered questions, of the "what-ifs" that will never really change the world that keeps on spinning in its ordinary path careless of who's in, and I'm really a dot, even smaller pixel of importance in this bigger scheme of time. Even time grows old and sees me wait for I don't know what, and perhaps even laughs at my expense.